The Telemachus Story Archive

Butter Ball Parade
Chapter 1
By baboonfan



Butter Ball parade, part 1

Larry Bogges open his eyes. What he didn’t see was his upscale Manhattan apartment. What he didn’t see was his beautiful, if brain-dead, trophy wife at his side. What he did see was darkness. The last thing he could remember was in his expensively furnished office, when two large policemen had burst in and told him that he was under arrest for embezzlement, insider trading, and theft of his employee’s retirement and health package funds, then how they shot at him with a shock gun, then passing out.

Larry felt very tired. His whole body felt like lead. And it was cold. He felt his body break out into gooseflesh. Suddenly, a bright light was flashed into his eyes, and he was blinded.

A deep voice said, “Finally, he’s awake. TURN ON THE LIGHTS!” The voice ordered. Suddenly a large “clonk” was heard, and light was everywhere. He seemed to be in a very large warehouse. Then he looked down at himself.

All he could see was pink. A smooth wall of pink. Then he ventured a touch. It was flesh. His flesh. He tried to look down at himself further, but his chin was blocked by mounds of fat. Oddly, he wasn’t scared. Larry reasoned that this must be his brain going through denial. Obviously, laying on his back on the freezing floor of a warehouse, and somehow he had bloated up to the size of a two walruses stuck together. And yet he wasn’t fazed. It wasn’t until he tried to move his arms that he began to feel the first twinge of panic. He could feel the movement, but he couldn’t see his limbs. His own girth falling into his face was obstructing his view. Larry tried to move into a more viable position, but he was stuck. No matter how rolled or shifted, he couldn’t get off his back. At this point Larry was past his numbed shock and grasped the full reality of the situation. He was pinned by his own weight. He desperately tried to pull himself backwards with his arms, trying to escape the massive sloping pink mountains of flab that was his own torso.

“Hehe. Sorry fatboy.” The voice chuckled. “You ain’t going nowhere.”

Larry felt himself being pulled forward, and while his body was lifted, Larry had no choice but to lean forward, into the folds of his bulbous fat. He began to have trouble breathing, his mouth being covered by the dense bulk. For a second Larry thought he would drown in his own fat, what a way to go!

When he was upright, he could breathe again. He looked around and saw hundreds of fat blob men, just like him. He recognized his friend Upton Sulk, who recently came under media fire for stealing from his own charity, and Howard Cline, the congressman who had been exposed for taking bribes, and even those Enron executives. Now they were all mounds of blubber. They were as fat and immobile as he was. In front of him stood the man with the deep voice. He was one of the policemen who had shocked him. He was about 6 foot 1, around sixties years old, with a trim gray moustache and a flat top. He still had on his pants, but now he was only wearing a wife beater and his bag on his chest. Although he was an older man, he was in terrific shape with bulging muscles and plentiful gray chest hair. He sneered at Larry with his arms crossed over his bulging pecs.

Suddenly Larry snapped. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME YOU BASTAR?!” He was silenced by a swift kick delivered by the older cop.

“Shut your hole, blubber boy. By the authority vested in me by the President of the United States you have been placed under arrest for unscrupulous business practices.” The cop growled.

After recovering from the kick, Larry started off again.

“WHAT?! YOU CAN’T DO THIS! THIS IS CRUEL AND UNUSUAL! IT GOES AGAINST THE CONST- UGH!” Larry was cut off with another kick, this time right into his left man boob.

“SHUT IT!” The cop bellowed. “YOU DIDN’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THE RIGHTS OF YOUR EMPLOYEES WHEN YOU STOLE THEIR PENSIONS! YOU TREATED PEOPLE LIKE SHIT! WELL NOW YOU ARE A FAT SHIT! GET USED TO IT!”

Larry, knowing he’d get kicked again if he raised his voice, asked in a quieter tone.

“But, but, how? How are you allowed to do all of… this?” Larry asked, while looking around at the fat, defeated looking men. The cop gave him an evil grin.

“Simple. The new Prez is sick of shits like you, making life miserable for the whole country. By an almost unanimous Supreme Court vote on the President’s secret “ANTI-SCUM” bill, we now have the right and the means to remove, then sentence you as we see fit. He knows how sick Americans are of turds like you. Sucking up all the money, breaking laws, treading all over the people, and when and if you get caught, all you get is a few months at club fat! Well that’s all changed now. No more going easy on crap like you! WELCOME TO THE NEW CLUB FAT!! ” And then he let loose with a villainous, spite filled laugh.

Larry Bogges, former ceo and big shot, now big blog of fat, broke down and wept. He couldn’t imagine what was to come next.

to be continued...

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